The Worst Broadcast Journalist (currently)

Pictured above, mouth always open, is Keith Olbermann. Mr. Olbermann used to be one of the wittiest and funniest men in sportscasting when he used to host "The Big Show" with Dan Patrick. After he flipped out and left ESPN he became a regular newscaster and, up until last night, I have been able to tolerate his wildly leftist rants since I believe in free speech and equal opportunity. I don't mind that he is harshly negative about all things conservative even though he rarely backs his opinion with facts. His show is pure opinion and, I assume, gets good enough ratings to keep him on the air.

Last night he made comments about the Virginia Tech shootings that were just ridiculous. He called out the University President and Police Force as if they weren't doing their very best to understand the terrible tragedy that happened yesterday. I will not say they handled the situation perfectly, but who could. If they had "closed" the campus the shooter would, most likely, have found victims at a different location. There was no way to prevent what happened yesterday, this is a time to grieve and reflect. This is not a time to be a total jerk and point your finger at someone while acting as if you could have done it better. I especially hate that when you don't offer any constructive ideas with your criticism.

Mr. Olbermann is "The worst person in the world" to use one of his catchphrases.

Gun Control Debate

I think the argument for more or less gun control that is popping up as a result of the Virginia Tech shootings can be answered pretty simply.

If the gun was purchased legally, then more laws might help.

If the gun was not purchased illegally, then more laws probably won't help.

Which was it?

Ridiculous

The Knoxville News-Sentinal published their annual summer camps insert this past Sunday. Reading through it I dealt the sad realization of where our society is headed. In addition to most of the "camps" being day care so that parents don't have to raise their own kids, I saw Wizard Camp. At Wizard camp you will learn levitation among other things. Yes, Harry Potter stuff is real don't ya know!

P.S. I do realize that in some families both parents absolutely have to work. A lot of times it reminds of people who get a dog to leave it in the yard all the time though.

Movie Review (Shooter)

Shooter is the oh-so-typical ex-military expert recall/conspiracy theory story with some new faces thrown in the mix. I expected this to suck mightily and only went because it was the matinée in West Virginia last week. The story is actually pretty decent and I never actually wanted to leave. The kid who plays F.B.I. agent Nick Memphis was great and had some pretty decent zingers which he delivers in a fantastic deadpan. Marky Mark is still just pretty, cannot act, and belongs in underwear ads. He did pull the role off ok except for the fact that he has not one ounce of Marine in him and is not at all believable as a Gunny. It's easy to look past that and just watch the action though, which is decent. There are a few little details bloopers that I will allow to be overlooked since their military adviser obviously sucked. I did want to point out one issue that cracked me up. In the pictured scene there is a great shootout on a farm in Chantilly Virginia. They cut from that scene to the next and it says they are Bozeman Montana. During the phone conversation you learn that only one day has passed.

These two locations are 2,117 miles apart.

If you like military crap, and action go see it. If you are a Marky Mark fan, that's too bad.

The Don Imus coup

I feel the need to weigh in on the recent events surrounding Don Imus. Before I start, let me say that I am not a fan of his nor have I ever been. I do feel the need to defend the guy a little though.

What he said was, at worst, just a little rude. He has been far more offensive in the past and to be fired for something that is barely even insensitive seems crazy. I realize that Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson are leading the lynch mob; this should automatically red flag the whole thing as ridiculous. To put this in perspective and try to achieve true equality in our society let's ask the questions that need to be asked.

Would the punishment be the same for a black man/woman?

Have those very words been uttered by those women in their locker room?

Why is there a double standard for people based on skin color?

Why do we not fire every black or Hispanic man for using racially charged speech?

Nicely stated

I got this in a forward, and it was attributed to Jay Leno. Jay Leno quoted the last paragraph only, the rest was written by someone else.

Reference: http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/jayleno.asp

The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some poll data
I found rather hard to believe. It must be true given the source, right?

The Newsweek poll alleges that 67 percent of Americans are unhappy with the
direction the country is headed and 69 percent of the country is unhappy
with the performance of the president. In essence 2/3s of the citizenry
just ain't happy and want a change.

So being the knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking, ''What we are so
unhappy about?''

Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 days a
week? Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the
summer and heating in the winter? Could it be that 95.4 percent of these
unhappy folks have a job? Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery
store at any time and see more food in moments than

Darfur has seen in the last year?

Maybe it is the ability to drive from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic
Ocean without having to present identification papers as we move through
each state? Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would
find along the way that can provide temporary shelter? I guess having
thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the world is just
not good enough. Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency
workers show up and provide services to help all and even send a helicopter
to take you to the hospital.

Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home. You may
be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of
trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to
extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family and your belongings. Or
if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or
prowler intrudes , an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest
will come to defend you and your family against attack or loss. This all in
the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and
pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90 percent of teenagers own
cell phones and computers.

How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy
that are the envy of everyone in the world? Maybe that is what has 67
percent of you folks unhappy.

Fact is, we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world
has ever seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet has a great
disdain for its citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed
people in the world who do nothing but complain about what we don't have ,
and what we hate about the country instead of thanking the good Lord we live
here.

I know, I know. What about the president who took us into war and has no
plan to get us out? The president who has a measly 31 percent approval
rating? Is this the same president who guided the nation in the dark days
after 9/11? The president that cut taxes to bring an economy out of
recession? Could this be the same guy who has been called every name in the
book for succeeding in keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from
terrorist attacks?

The commander in chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending
you and me? Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show?
Did this news affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't take a
look around for yourself and see all the good things and be glad?

Think about it......are you upset at the President because he actually
caused you personal pain OR is it because the "Media" told you he was
failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.


Make no mistake about it. The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have
volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom.
There is currently no draft in this country. They didn't have to go. They
are able to refuse to go and end up with either a ''general'' discharge, an
''other than honorable'' discharge or, worst case scenario, a
''dishonorable'' discharge after a few days in the brig.


So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of
Americans? Say what you want but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds it
leads and they specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash
with blood and guts. How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the
corner? The media knows this and media outlets are for-profit corporations.
They offer what sells , and when criticized, try to defend their actions by
"justifying" them in one way or another. Just ask why they tried to allow a
murderer like O.J. Simpson to write a book about how he didn't kill his
wife, but if he did he would have done it this way......Insane!

Stop buying the negativism you are fed everyday by the media. Shut off the
TV, burn Newsweek, and use the New York Times for the bottom of your bird
cage. Then start being grateful for all we have as a country. There is
exponentially more good than bad.


We are among the most blessed people on Earth and should thank God several
times a day, or at least be thankful and appreciative.


"With hurricanes, tornadoes, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding,
severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and
with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, "Are we sure this is a
good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"

Rowdy Weather

Last night after an episode of House, the weather came on. Matt Hinkin said there was some nasty weather headed our way and it was moving at almost 40 miles per hour. People to the North of us were reporting 3-inch hail and 70 MPH winds. I thought about this for a moment and realized my new truck was outside, alone, in the path of the bitter weather. I ran to the garage where I came across the actual problem.

Think back to the Home Improvement Nightmare series from the Captain. You will recall that one of the things offered by the store was to keep the leftover material from the job. Part of that material was 48 boxes of beautiful ceramic tile. That tile was sitting where I needed to park my truck. Each box of that tile weighs 38.1 pounds. I'll give you a second for that.....

1828.8 lbs.

I moved it in fifteen minutes from one corner to the other. The worst part about moving it is you have to remove it from the pallet, move the pallet, and re-stack on the pallet. I moved every box 2 times....

3657.6 lbs

I believe, I will skip my workout on the Bowflex tonight.

On a side note, as soon as I closed the garage door after snuggling my truck up against the Pilot, the storm hit our area.

Good car dealers in Knoxville

As Many of you know, my car buying research has been both extensive and quite frustrating. Trying to be an informed consumer is sometimes more trouble than it's worth I think. With all that said let me recommend two places to complete a transaction.

First, I bought the 2003 Honda Pilot w 44k on it at Duncan Automotive and would definitely recommend stopping by to see Jason Taylor next time you are shopping. This place is zero pressure and very up front with everything. Once Jason has helped you find the right vehicle, Tony will take over and help get you out the door as painlessly as possible.

Duncan Automotive - more info »

10631 Parkside Dr, Knoxville, TN

(865) 693-2401 - close call

Second, I bought the 2002 Tundra w 65k on it from ETN pre-owned which I had previously avoided since I thought it was a "Clinton Highway" (buy here pay here) lot. They are a subsidiary of East Tennessee Nissan of Knoxville which is part of the Victory Automotive group. Dave Early can help you find what you need, and then Travis will help with the financing. Best of all if you tell them Captain Dude (use my real name please) sent you, I get $100 for every referral.

For the social experiment previously I was dealing with the Ted Russell dealerships around town. They did cal, and were very apologetic saying they would do anything at all to help me. When I gave them detailed information about what I was looking for they couldn't come up with a single vehicle. If you are a Ted Russell customer, I hope your experience was better. I promise you could have done better elsewhere.

The "other" ride

Since I was bragging about my new wheels I thought I would put the other one up. Yeah that's the new hood, great job by the folks at CARS Inc..

The Captain's New Ride

Yes boys and girls, that is a 2002 Toyota Tundra SR5 TRD. I have no idea what anything after Tundra means. yesterday was the last day of the month, I got a deal.

If anyone wants to buy a set of Mickey Thompson Tires and Rims hit me up, I am not into that and would rather have some Michelins.

New Project

The Captain has stumbled across this old girl. She is a 1978(?) Guild FJ12SB I cannot even find information on the model number. I have written a few folks, and consulted other on beginning the restoration process.
CORRECTION, according to some guitar experts I e-mailed here are the specs:

It is an F-512 Sunburst guitar. It is all solid woods--spruce top and
rosewood back and sides. Jay Pilzer, New Hope Guitar Traders,
www.guildguy.com, phone/fax (931) 433-1955

I even got an e-mail from George Gruhn himself:

I am forwarding this to Jay Pilzer for him to help you.

George Gruhn

The wrong bridge was glued on, and she has been really beaten up and not cared for throughout her life. Wish me luck as I begin to unravel her story and begin this restorative process.

P.S. The case is in equally as poor condition, so that will be next.

Iran (idiots)

So, people have been trying very hard to be diplomatic with Iran's megalomaniac leader for what three years now? At every turn the guy dares the entire non-Arab world to do anything to him. This guy is the most dangerous man on the planet and needs to be wiped out. I believe the final straw will be how quickly they hand over these British detainees. If it doesn't happen in the next 48 hours another war may be coming quickly.

Did you know that he was elected because he was a very popular soccer player?

Roofer in Knoxville (Zanoni Roofing)

After dealing with a load of idiots who wanted $800 an hour to fix my roof I found an honest contractor. Matt Zanoni stopped by at 1945 Saturday and did the job for $35. I paid him $50 just for being honest and upstanding in a line of work which appears to be full of rip-offs. If you need some roofing work done, check him out or give him a call at 865-898-3144.

The Computer Depot

One of the Captain's good friends has recently celebrated ten years in business in the Powell community. The Computer Depot can definitely take care of your needs. Please stop by or call next time you need parts or service for your PC. They also have great deals on used laptops and PCs.

The Captain crashes

Last night while taking the girls to church I stopped at a particularly busy intersection and waited for the light to change. The light turned green and the Toyota Rav-4 in front of me started to move so I let off the brake. At that moment my oldest daughter yelled something behind me so I looked in the rear-view mirror to see her dancing with some funny sunglasses on. It was at that point I completely destroyed the rear end of the Rav-4. We pulled over in a parking lot and the poor lady said she had to hit her brakes because the man in front of her stopped. When I hit her the car in front of her wast about 20 yards ahead of her, I have no idea why she stopped. As we waited for the police she must have repeated that statement 50 times. When the police came they interviewed her first and listened to the "he slammed on his brakes in front of me story." The cops walked over to me grinning a bit and said "There wasn't anyone in front of her was there?" I told them I hadn't seen any reason for her to stop but acknowledged it was my fault anyway. They chose not to give me a citation. Fortunately the Pilot only needs a little hood work, I wish I could say the same for her Toyota. 10 mph appears to have destroyed her lift gate and at least one rear quarter panel.

P.S. The Captain's wife was very pleased that I chose to drive her car last night. (sarcasm)

American Idol's terrible year

Sometimes American Idol has kids on it that can really just blow you away. Conversely, they have years where people like Reuben and Fantasia win. This is definitely an off year for Idol, they are terrible. To pay tribute to the singers out there who got the shaft I am starting a series of my favorite singer from other "reality" shows. I may even throw in some idol performances that truly brought it instead of this yodeling, beat-boxing crap. If you have time, watch all the videos as his talent really progresses towards the end.

For my first Montage, here is Mig Ayesa from RockStar:INXS.

Enjoy this Scene

Let me share with you a scene from one of the best movies ever. The movie is Crossroads starring Ralph Macchio and it is fantastically done. The long-haired guitarist in the end scene is Steve Vai, yes he is playing his parts. Ralph is NOT playing but he sure does a great job faking the fingerings.

And people ask why we homeschool

Oregon Biology Teacher Fired Over Bible References

My roofing woes

Since my ridgevent is in my backyard, and we are expecting some rain, I decided to call and get that dude put back on the house. Opening the local paper to the Service Provider section I began
dialing the roofers in order. First, almost all of these are cell numbers that appear to either be the wife or girlfriend with a screaming baby on their hip. Secondly these guy apparently think they have cured cancer or something based on their prices. The first lady says they have to see the roof to give an estimate, which I mostly disagree with in this case. Then she says they have a $200 minimum.

No Thanks.

I called the next dude and he was near my house but needed to call back. He calls back and said he also needs to see the roof but is nearby. He hands the phone to someone else who put my address in their GPS Nav system. Five minutes later they are outside. This dude pulls up in a Ford F-250 FX4 crew cab that is maybe a year old. Five dudes jump out of the truck and the driver shakes my hand and says "where is the vent?"

"In the backyard." I replied

They all run to the backyard.

"You have a ladder?" asks Mr. in-charge

"Yes, why?" from the Captain

"We need it."

I handed my ladder to some 18 yr old kid and he starts climbing my roof while Mr. in-charge is barking orders and having these boys run hither and yon doing I don't know what. I am wondering if this jackass knows I have not hired him at this point. He then looks at me and says

"I'll do it for $200, no big deal"

I tell him "I am still getting estimates, but I appreciate you time."

He says, "I can't come back for that price."

"Other people can." I inform him.


Why does he think he can pull up in a $45,000 truck with five dudes and charge me $200 for about 15 minutes of work?

I did find a dude that said he would do it for $70 which seems fair to me.

This is so sad

Mother Arrested After First-Grade Son Brings Crack Cocaine to Show-and-Tell

The headline pretty much sums it up, but read it anyway. Interesting no pictures of the mother or son, GEE I WONDER WHY.

Social Experiment part 2

This weekend the Captain decided to look at and drive some Honda Accords. I drove two older models (2000 & 2001) then saw a 2003 advertised online at the SAME LOT where the truck thing happened. I gave them a call and asked if the mileage advertised was correct and whether or not the vehicle was available. Of course it was, so I drove 20 miles to take a look since the car seemed to be an exceptional value($13,995). I showed up at the lot and met the very friendly Internet Manager who seemed to be a nice man. We chatted a minute then he walked me to the car. I was a bit shocked to see a 2005 2 door coupe with 21k miles on it sitting in front of me, he had pulled it to the front of the showroom when I told him I was coming.

"This is the wrong car." I said

"Are you sure?" came his witty reply

I related to him my experience from the previous week, his face turned an interesting pink color. He sat at his computer and magically determined the car I wanted had sold. How this was possible now and not 30 minutes previously was of great interest to me.

"Why did you say the vehicle was here?" came from the Captain

He shrugs his shoulders.

"Can I interest you in anything else?" asks doofus

I picked his most expensive used Accord, the one he pulled up, and asked to drive it. Doofus was very excited about this. When we returned he asks what I thought.

I left.

Social Experiment (Knoxville Car Dealers and Car Lots)

In collaboration with the VelvetMantis from bugly.com, we have decided to conduct a social experiment using local car dealers. We will use both blogs to detail visits to one or two car lots per week in an effort to uncover some unsavory practices. I will start things off with the ad pictured above.

The ad shown was from the Knoxville News-Sentinel and is actually still displayed on this particular dealer's website. I called the dealer about the highlighted vehicle to confirm the price and ascertain the mileage. The young man on the phone needed to go out to verify the information, of course, so I gave him my name and number. Five minutes later he called back to say the truck was still available and told me the mileage was around 68k. I drove over to the dealer spent about ten minutes going over the truck then drove it around their test driving loop. This all took about 40 minutes total. I then wanted to find out what I could get for my trade as the vehicle was fairly nice for the price.

The young man says " Just between you and me, if I give you a thousand for your trade and knock a thousand off of mine where would we be?" I said "I'll buy it right now."
He goes in to talk to the "manager" and comes out about ten minutes later.

"We have a problem," he says. "That ad is a MISPRINT in the paper. That vehicle should be $17,995."

I left.

Here is why we are conducting this experiment. This is the second time I have gone to this car dealer about six months apart and the exact same thing has happened both times. This, in conjunction with some of the other experiences I am having while car shopping, is leading me to believe that these guys are all using bait and switch type tactics. We will compile our information and ask for a response from the owners of these places of business. At that point we will decide whether or not to make this information more "public."

Actual Headlines

These are actual headlines from FoxNews:

Man Burns Genitals in 'Jackass' Stunt

Gunmen Dognap L.A. Family's 5 Puppies

Florida Man: Chicken Burrito Paralyzed Me

Killer Meat-Eating Frogs Terrorize San Francisco

Slow times these must be.

The Captain almost died (not really)

Today, March 3rd, in Knoxville was terribly windy. I went outside and noticed the ridge-vent for my house was being torn off by the gusts. I ran to my shed and grabbed some deck screws, my cordless screwdriver, and tool belt. I then grabbed my 40' extension ladder and proceeded to climb onto the roof well-equipped; or so I thought. When I reached the roof, 10.5', I realized the pitch was far too steep for me to walk up and I began to ponder how a professional would do this job. As I was theorizing, the wind whipped up and I felt the ladder "shudder." This was quite unpleasant. I began to think I should just pay someone $50 to do this while simultaneously the ladder begins to "slide" along the gutter. Let us stop for a moment to discuss the physics of this slide. The Captain weighs 160lbs, the ladder weighs probably 100lbs. That downward force will prevent the bottom feet of the ladder from traversing in the same direction as the "slide." Consider also that that downward force decreases geometrically as the 260 aforementioned pounds begin to yaw off of the vertical axis. Once the vertical axis is sufficiently compromised, about 12 inches is my guess, Sir Isaac Newton can then have a heyday as we begin to research terminal velocity from 10.5 feet with a decreasing weight starting at 260lbs. Fortunately, the Captain's cat-like reflexes enabled him to quickly reach the ground on the vertical axis(I did that thing where you put your feet on the rails and slide down). during my slide, I notice my 7 year old has come out to watch and , according to Murphy's law, has decided to put herself in the path of the destruction. She responds to a vocal command immediately while I hit the ground and grab the now 100 pounds yawing heavily to the left at about 60 degrees. I realize quickly I cannot halt the ladder, yet my macho instincts grab the structure with great ferocity. The ladder continues as if I am not present and I feel some "oddities" in my abdomen and "other places."

I will have to see the doctor.

Paul Benton Chevrolet and Twin City Mazda

I wanted to take a moment to call out two incredibly terrible car lots in the greater Knox county area. The first lot, Paul Benton Chevrolet, had a gorgeous 2005 Chevrolet Equinox listed online at $14,375. Knowing the average price and excellent safety ratings for this vehicle Mrs. Dude called and asked if the information, including price and mileage, was accurate and whether or not the vehicle was available. The sales-jackass took her name and number then WALKED OUT TO THE VEHICLE, called back and said "Yes ma'am, but it does have 1 more mile on it than listed." We scrambled to clean up our old van, load our flu-ridden family into the car, and headed to Oak Ridge happy that this process of car buying may soon be over. When we got there, a young lady came out and my wife told her we had been dealing with Ben Nichols, and were there to see the Equinox. We walked over to look while she went to get the keys. As she approached me she said "I apologize, but the price on the Internet is incorrect; but we'll sell it for the price in the window." GEE, you'll obey the law, thanks. We demanded to see Mr. Nichols and after a few minutes of saying that it wasn't his fault because:

1. He isn't the Internet manager.
2. Some other company does all their Internet stuff.
3. Today ends in a y.

Not once did he say it was his mistake. When we asked if he noticed the price problem we asked if he had attempted to call us back, of course he didn't. I completely believe this was bait and switch and will certainly be turning them in to the BBB.

Next I head to the "World famous airport motor mile." Twin City Mazda has three Hyundai Sonatas that appear to be competitively priced. I have already driven one, so I just want to know the trade value of my van. I tell the "lot hawk" that I would prefer to finance $13,000 or less and to see what he can do. He fills out the "four-square" customer sheet, and disappears. He comes back ten minutes later with his "manager." First off, the Captain is youngish looking so keep that in mind. This 25 year old manager walks in and says "How are you feeling big man?" I immediately know this guy is a loser and would put his name here if I remembered it. I am 6' tall and weigh a whole 160lbs. I said "I am doing well, how are you?"

He replies, "If we can do your trade and $13,000 will you buy it right now?"

Me: "No sir, I have an appointment with Beaty Chevrolet to drive an Impala after this, but your numbers sound good."

Him: "Why Beaty, just go to West down the road a block."

Me: "Well, because that would be rude."

(during this exchange I am seated, he is standing over me in a small cubicle.)

He sits at this point, crosses his legs, stares at his customer sheet and looks perplexed.

Me: "I like the figures, can you do that? If so, we would test drive this vehicle now and keep it in mind."

Him: " I don't know if I can if you won't make a commitment."

Me: "What does me making a commitment have to do with that?"

Him: (silence)

Me: "Can you not do the math without an instantaneous sale?"

Him: (silence) (confusion)

Me: "I have done this a few times, let's not play games."

Him: "I am not playing games."

Me: " I appreciate your time, have a nice day."

Him: "Well I think we can work..."

Me: " I am done here!" (other customers starting to stare)

Him: " Oh, Mr. (Captain Dude) I really want.." (now I am a Mister and not "Big man")

At this point I pushed past him and his lot hawk to get out the door.

I don't want them to give cars away, but let's be realistic. Dude, you sell cars. You are not smarter than me, I can do math, and know what I want. Don't be condescending to me, and don't try your old-school high-pressure horse crap on people who can do a little Internet research and/or can balance their checkbook. The place where I bought my Pilot was great if you want an nice easy-going experience coupled with some really nice vehicles go to:

Duncan Automotive

maps.google.com

10631 Parkside Dr
Knoxville, TN 37922
(865) 671-1411

Get directions

They will treat you right I promise.

JC vs. JC

Hey, big news, James Cameron found the tomb of Jesus Christ(horse crap). I will not call out how ridiculous this is, but read this article. By the way if you're curious it is always slam Christianity season in Hollywood.

My Broncos

In another seemingly bonehead move by GM Matt Millen of the Lions, my beloved Broncos got Mr. Dre' Bly in a trade for OT George Foster and RB Tatum Bell. George has been durable but not as promising an athlete as he appeared to be at the NCAA level, he can be easily replaced.

Tatum never emerged like he should have as a starter and became more of a fumbler in all subsequent seasons with Denver. He lost all five of his fumbles last year. Mike Bell is a touch bigger than Tatum and can hopefully step in as a starter.

Dre' Bly is no spring chicken and is also a bit undersized for the newer receivers coming out these days. With Champ Bailey on the other side of the field for the monsters he appears to be a perfect fit. Some folks knock his tackling but looking at his stats he appears to be quite capable in that area. I also don't think you should knock any one athlete on the Lions team since they always seem to have only one or two natural athletes on the field at any one time.

Way to go Mr. Millen. I wonder if I can apply for his job? I hate that I always feel so sorry for the Lions.

We are sick (again)

My whole family minus the Mrs. is batting the flu right now. I have taken more sick days and medication in the past six months than I have my entire life combined. Our 7 yr old developed symptoms Saturday/Sunday and we all got on a preventative, Tamiflu, Monday but that didn't help. I became symptomatic next followed by the five year old. Now the chunky little guy seems a bit mopey but no fever yet.

On the plus side I got to find out that our crappy old minivan needs $1100 dollars worth of repairs and the back to the Future marathon was on WGN yesterday. I was extremely disappointed that they chose to air the phrase "son-of-a-b**ch" fifteen time in the middle of the day so that my kids could not watch it. The other favorite word in the film was "damn" uttered at least twenty times per film. Quite unfortunate since those were nice simple movies with no political undertones in them. Imagine that, a movie(s) you could watch that doesn't have an ulterior motive by people with no education or political insight. What a thought.

I have to go decide whether or not to scrap our van or buy, another, new car.

Hardball and Debbie Wasserman-Schultz

I am not a fan of hardball, but last night a "debate" caught my eye while flipping channels. Last night Chris Matthews asked Ms. long last name (D-Fl) what should be done about the Iraq war and Afghanistan etc.. Her colleague for the debate was Chris Shays (R-Conn). I encourage you to watch the video and see how vile and hateful this woman is. When questions are posed to her she responds with only the typical "President Bush ruined the world" rhetoric. Watch Mr. Shays as he tries to answer questions and be cordial and this woman just spews hatred which is helpful to no one at all. She, and her party, offer nothing constructive at all.

These people, Democrats, promised us they would get the troops out of Iraq, and "work 5 days a week" until there was some sort of resolution. That quote is directly from Nancy Pelosi. Since they assumed power they have worked, at most, three days a week and have done nothing but bash the President. This is not helpful, PLEASE offer solutions and not character bashing. I am perfectly willing to give anyone a chance but how can you when all they say is "...failure of leadership..." PEOPLE, you are the leaders now and you can't even agree on issues within your own party. The republicans may have "screwed everything up" but at least they could agree and do SOMETHING.

Enjoy your two years folks, it'll be over before you know it. Keep up the good work and it also won't matter who gets your party's nomination.

"Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory."

P.S. what the heck is up with her blue eye-liner too?

Al Gore (tool)

What is wrong with this guy? He doesn't seem like a complete idiot yet when he opens his mouth he really tries to prove it. Yesterday day it was discovered that Mr. Global Warming spends $30,000 a month to heat and cool his home. His 20 room 8 bathroom Nashville Mansion. I am all for making all the money you can and living how you want, as long as you aren't telling other people they need to pick up your slack. It's also odd that people attach themselves to this guy as if he is anyone special at all. See Mike's blog as a reference.

On a lighter note I saw "The Hollywood Primaries" on Extra or some other TV rag. Celebrities always make me feel so smart. Jeff Goldblum was asked which candidate he currently liked and he said Al Gore, of course no one had the nerve to tell him Mr. Gore isn't running. It was nice to see some of the stars remain neutral on the question, but Oprah's buddy was the worst of all. She led some sort of retarded cheer for Barack Obama. It was sad to watch.

Movie Review (Ghost Rider)

Ghost Rider is a not-so-typical adaptation of the oh-so-typical "I sold my soul to the devil and now I deserve a second chance" genre. Right up front let me say I did not understand a lot of the movie. He is supposed to morph into this thing in the presence of evil yet several times he gets jumped by demons and doesn't change. That notwithstanding, the movie has some decent scenes, the action scenes are ok but corny, and the cast is decent. With respect to the cast I think Eva Mendes should have worn at least one shirt that fit her, and Nick Cage delivered the same performance from his last ten films. At the risk of sounding ghey for Nick Cage, he shredded his body for this role. In a rare shirtless scene he looks like an Olympic athlete. I apologize to the fans of the comic book, I am sure I am offending you but this movie just wasn't for me. On the bright side, Sam Elliot and Peter Fonda really gave good performances.

This one is a rental at best.

Movie Review (We Are Marshall)

The tragic true story of the Marshall University football team from 1970. In short the movie is fantastic if not a heart wrencher. Although necessary, the emotions for the story are difficult at best yet, in the end, it wraps up nicely. The story is brilliantly told during the dark days after the Marshall University football team was wiped out in an airplane crash on November 14, 1970. The movie takes you though the anguish of the entire town. The great sorrow affects players who did not travel to that game, a coach who gave up his seat for father, the student of the school, and the parents/townsfolk that so dearly loved their football team. One of the most impactful moments of the film for me was the introduction of Bobby Bowden; then head coach of the West Virginia University Mountaineers. Marshall needed a new offense (the veer) and WVU used that same offense so they traveled to Morgantown where Mr. Bowden allowed them unmitigated access to all of his coaching materials. For years I have heard what a classy man he is yet never understood why; you, Mr. Bowden, are a gentleman first class. The spirit of Jack Lengyel is wonderfully childlike and captured well by Matthew Mconahey (intentional misspelling). A lone bright light during the dark days following the tragedy he infused others with his spirit to bring the best parts of their spirit ( if not their abilities) forward. The cast is tremendous complimenting each other at every turn and nothing got too over-dramatic. The coach's character is summed up best in a scene where he is asked why he would want to coach a team that does not exist. simply stated he says "I thought I could help."

Having watched Marshall for the past several years myself their spirit prevails and is exemplified even by their recent and current players. I remember Watching several years ago when Byron Leftwich broke his leg and refused to leave the field. His teammates had to carry him to the huddle after a long pass down the field. They did not win that game but, in that case, it showed where his loyalty was. When most college stars would sit down and wait for their Sunday paycheck, he wanted to win. I will leave you with this scene:

Senator John McCain

I am not a fan of Senator McCain though, currently, he will be the next President. Yesterday in a rare conservative sighting of the senator he spoke out harshly against abortion. Is the Senator going to go conservative? I will be watching him closely since I have previously thought he could run for either party.

EDIT:
I felt the need to clarify that I am a huge fan of Senator McCain as a man, a hero and servant to our country. I have not previously liked his politics is all.

Senator Scott Brown

The gentleman above had the fortitude to call out some high school sophomores the other day who thought they could use the Internet to slander this man and his family. I believe what he did was appropriate and shows these young people they must be accountable for their words and actions. You can click here to read the article. In a separate write-up one parent of a slandering teen says the Senator was way out of line but, of course, says nothing about her child being a complete turd. Typical, let's teach kids they are all the same and that there is no accountability for anything they do.

Restless Leg Syndrome (total crap)

I was watching TV last night and saw a commercial for some crap called Restless Leg Syndrome. More specifically it was a particular type of medicine to help people deal with this problem. Wow, a miracle! I hope these same brilliant people can develop a cure for the following equally catastrophic illnesses:

I'm fat but won't quit eating too much syndrome
I want to be rich but hate to work syndrome
I think I know everything but I am really stupid syndrome ( I may have this one)
I don't like anyone but want everyone to like me syndrome

I think these are all about the same since the real name for Restless Leg Syndrome is "My legs feel funny because I'm too lazy to ever walk" syndrome. Pretty soon they will be making pills for everything.

We've been sick

First off, yes I have the cutest boy on the planet thank you for noticing. Secondly starting Sunday we have all not been feeling well with the exception of Mrs. Dude. She had the wonderful task of trying to nursemaid all of us from Sunday afternoon through Monday as the entire house struggled with a stomach virus. I lost about 8 lbs via various means and slept on the couch in the "sick room." Mrs. Dude ran around with homemade Chicken Soup and Lysol trying to prevent the stuff from moving beyond the borders of the room I was in with one of the kids. I think the storm has passed, I hope none of my readers end up with this thing, it was awful.

Statistics suck

After reading the article I linked to in the post about black doctors I wanted to throw around some of the statistics that were listed. Statistics can be a nice way to determine a baseline or pattern but instead are often used to manipulate figures toward some predetermined goal these days. That said, let's look at the numbers:

9% = the percent of Knox county that is black
19= number of Knox county doctors that are black
1.2%= the percent of doctors in Knox county that are black

So should 9% of the doctors be black in Knox county or how do you determine the correct level? Which statistic do you use?

Some interesting quotes from the same article:

"When you think about Tennessee, it does not sound like it’s a happenin’ state," Davidson, 45, said. "You need social or cultural things that are appealing to African-American physicians that you would typically have found in a larger city, that we don’t have here in Knoxville."

Should Knoxville concentrate on becoming a booming diverse metropolis, even though that is not the city's history?

That’s unfortunate, he said, because young black professionals need a strong support base and want a diverse social outlet that often is lacking in Knoxville.

Could we have some examples please?

"That’s not only true for medical doctors but with other professionals as well. Knoxville is not a good place to be. That has been articulated to me," Rollins said.

What was articulated, and by whom? Who is telling anyone of any race not to move here?

Waters admits he doesn’t have any answers. But people should be concerned, he said, because a lot of blacks don’t want to locate here, and "that’s a big problem."

Should we drive to Atlanta, and move black doctors here against their will? I recall something like this happening a few hundred years ago with Africa and ships; no one seemed to care for that idea.

The black doctors in town, he said, are a "very eclectic group. Everyone does their own thing."

"I don’t speak on a regular basis with other black physicians," Foster said. "I don’t know why. I go to church with Evelyne Davidson but probably hadn’t spoken a word to her in three years."

Well crap, if the doctors in town don't even speak to each other how can we get them to bring in people who don't live here?

Recruiting Black Doctors

I was reading this article and have to ask why. The statement at the top is:

Physician, recruit thyself

Knox medical community, city must remedy lack of black doctors by finding ways to attract, retain them

What does that even mean? We should recruit people based on the color of their skin? Should more of the new black doctors be men or women? How tall should they be? What kind of cars should they drive? This is stupid, who cares what color your doctor is? If you care, why do you care?

Get the best candidates regardless of race or gender, that's what equality is.

Barack Obama is "fired up."

He did it! Barack Obama just knocked himself and Hillary right out of contention for the democratic Presidential nomination. The two least qualified people on the planet should negate each other in the primaries. Thank goodness he decided to run now and dash Hillary's chances. On the plus side, Senator Obama gave a rousing speech but unfortunately called out "failure of leadership." Whether he is talking about the President, congress, or both this was a mistake. The congress has flopped to the other party and so far they haven't done anything either so you can't stand on them, and the President is leaving in 2008 no matter what. He also threw out something about universal healthcare, but he will soon see that no one wants to pay for such a grandiose idea. Lastly, he says he has a plan to withdraw troops from Iraq by sometime next year. I hope we get to see this plan since, so far, no one can produce anything except to tell the President they don't like his plan. If you're going to complain, at least come up with an alternative.

If you are a Hillary Clinton supporter and believe that this man is not qualified based on his lack of experience, just remember this:
1. He's been a Senator almost as long as her.
2. He actually lived in the state where he got elected.
3. He actually got elected for who he is, not who he is married to.

A friend told me the other day that it's amazing watch Democrats snatch defeat from the jaws of victory with their crappy candidates. John Edwards is the front runner for their nomination by default. The sad truth is Al Gore, complete moron, could announce his candidacy a week before the primary and beat all these clowns for the nomination. Why you ask is that; he invented the Internet and then discovered global warming since being thumped in 2000. I hope we get someone with their own ideas running. I don't want anyone elected because we think their skin color or gender qualifies them for anything, that applies to Republicans as well.

The astronaut debacle

So this stuff is cracking me up. Our astronauts are the best and brightest both physically and mentally, of that I have no doubt. Unfortunately it looks like they might be would a little too tight in some cases. I can't believe what this woman was attempting to do. It does verify my argument about men and women working together closely for extended periods of time though.

Things like this are one of the reasons men and women shouldn't be on ships at sea together for months at a time. You wouldn't believe the crap those goes on on those things when they are underway for 6 months.

Movie Review (Deja Vu)

I saw Deja Vu last night and wasn't terribly disappointed. Denzel Washington takes the lead as ATF Agent Doug Carlin who appears to be very good at his job. Able to see crime scene and rapidly observe the most critical details. After "the disaster" enter Val Kilmer (looking chunky) and the FBI who have a new way to warp time so that they can watch the past. They notice Agent Carlin's nunchuck skillz and want to use him since they cannot record or rewind their ability to watch the past and need a keen observer. So the time warp thing is whack for sure but they do a believable job with the sci-fi aspect and don't throw it over the top anymore than they have to.

If you want to pick up the physics and science of the movie it will not be fun for you. If you can sit back and enjoy the ride it's a great edge of your set thriller. The only thing I did not like were the two or three reference made to "Oklahoma City" in reference to Denzel's character. That was never cleared up for me. The other thing I did not like is that some woman brought her 2 or 3 year old to the theater and that poor little girl saw and heard things no little person should. That said the violence/gore is CSI level stuff and not gratuitous at all. I would say they swore less then ten times in the movie and the only thing that absolutely didn't need to be there was a nude shot of the main chick.

Go check it out, it's at the dollar theaters.

SuperBowl 41

This just in! Apparently Rex Grossman sucks. Rarely in a team sport can you blame a loss on a single player; however, this is the second Super Bowl where I have seen this happen. Neil O'Donnell did it against Dallas several years back and Rex Wanted to see if he could duplicate the effort. I also thinks it's retarded that Dominic Rhodes and/or Joseph Addai and/or Jeff Saturday weren't the MVP. Once again, Peyton Manning was given something based on his name and not his play. Lastly, the best moment was this:

Peyton (What's in a name)

Congratulations again for making it to the SB Mr. Manning.
Now I opened the paper today and saw, on the cover no less, 49 children named after this dude. That is so freakin' weird! I am all for supporting a team and being a fan, but why do people attach to this individual? 2/3 of Tennessee became Colts fans when he got drafted, this confounds me. reading the sports section and hearing people brag about naming their kid, some when he was an incoming freshman, makes me think the world is actually ending. On the plus side, it does make me fell better about myself since I can name my children independently.

William Arkin (tool)

The gentleman pictured above is William Arkin, he is also a first rate tool. He was watching
an NBC Nightly News piece where a number of soldiers were expressing their frustration with the giant idiots in this country who claim to support the troops but not the war. Arkin then decided to write this article for his blog. What an idiot! Just so you know, this is what people who make that bogus troop support statement think, I don't care what they say. This jackass claims to have been an intelligence analyst in the military for four years, but his records seem a bit hard to track; his civilian life is pretty plain though. This article sums up Sir Jackass pretty well. For the record I want people to feel free to support or not support something but please stop the tiresome double talk.

Movie Review (Smokin' Aces)

At the urging of the VelveMantis from bugly.com I went to catch this movie while he and I were traveling.

This movie is about a dude, Buddy “Aces” Israel, with about ten people trying to kill him. The hit was ordered by some mob boss, and the FBI is trying to save him so he can testify against said mob boss. The above two sentences are the ONLY thing that made sense during this movie. Once the plot is formed it spirals into gratuitous violence and cussing interspersed with attempts at incredibly artsy camera work that turn out to just be annoying.

The cast in this is huge. Ben Affleck, Jeremy Piven, Ryan Reynolds, Andy Garcia, Ray Liotta, and one hundred other big names making cameos , some in disguise, pop up throughout the movie. This is a recipe for disaster and the movie just sucked. There are two black female “hitmen” that love to use the words “pussy” and “nigger” for shock value. The shock wears off after the first 80 uses of those words though. The movie appeared to have potential at the beginning and the story actually starts out pretty interesting before it devolves into chaos and stupidity.

The one brilliant bright moment was delivered in 120 seconds by Jason Bateman. He absolutely stole the show using his very limited role. His lines almost appeared to be ad-lib and were delivered perfectly.

If you are tempted or conned into seeing this, stick a knife in your leg to get out of going. The injury will be far less painful than sitting through this garbage.

Just the facts (Bill Clinton's legacy..etc)

Current unemployment is 4.6% by the way.



The things people think they know!



You should have to take a test to get a voter registration card.



I LOVE the protest warrior crew, they capture the true spirit of so many things.

Ford Motor Company gone ghey

That's real nice, good family values and all that. I thought that was tasteless and pretty gross until I saw this today. BE WARNED, that scene is nasty and graphic. It's from some show on FX that Ford sponsors.

Cary buying part two

Yesterday during lunch I went to a local dealer who advertised a 2006 Dodge Grand Caravan SXT for $13,900. When I got there we looked over the car and I asked what my truck was worth in trade. They wanted my 2001 B4000 and $4500. Seemed fair but then he said "We were looking at the wrong car." Takes me back out and shows me a 2006 Dodge Grand Caravan two trim levels below the SXT for the same price. He said the other had sold but he could do the current POS for the same price and no one could beat his price. I told him he didn't have the vehicle I came to see so I wasn't interested. His reply, " They're pretty much the same anyway." I had planned on just leaving but now I decided to make a point to the mental midget. I said " Jackass, if they are the same why is this one $4,000 more, and why doesn't it have the features I am looking for?" Idiots!
I saw a 2005 Grand Caravan in the paper at a different lot and drove over only to find out that it wasn't a Grand Caravan, it was the short wheelbase regular Caravan. This was particularly fun as they had to drive it over from a different lot. It's also fun to see the turds run out of the building when you pull up and hover around your car before you get out. Equally as fun to watch their whole body pucker up when I tell them I don't currently have a car payment. I told them I didn't need to look inside since this vehicle was the shorter wheelbase. Their line "Well these are a lot easier to park." My line "Jackasses, in the Chrysler minivans you cannot get rear heat and air for your children unless you get the long wheelbase." Response "The front blower works pretty good." Me "You're an idiot."
Today at lunch I am going to Carmax to see if the rumors are true. I would rather pay $1,000 more and dispense with these morons.

Buying Cars

As I prepare to sell my very cool little truck and end up driving a minivan myself, I feel the need to bitch about the whole car buying process. What is wrong with these people? They act like rocket scientists, you have to spend forever with a powerless individual, and they just try and rip you off. I understand they are trying to make money and that's fine, but the way they talk to people is ridiculous. "Well that's a wholesale price, your trade won't be worth as much." BS! I know what my truck is worth, and I know what your van is worth.

They dislike me because my vehicles are paid for, and I can do math.

Congratulations!

Congratulations to Peyton Manning and the Colts for getting the "monkey" off their backs. All the more appropriate to do it against the one team that has been the toughest for them, or anyone else, to beat the past five years. Great adjustments by the coaching staff at halftime to get the pressure off Manning too. As for the Bears, I still can't believe they are winning games.

Grey's Anatomy

I was reading this article, and wondered how we got to this point. Looking at what he said:

"No, I did not call (co-star) T.R. (Knight) a faggot," Washington told reporters. "Never happened, never happened."

The speech police, ironically so-called liberals, immediately jumped his case. First off, it appears he used the word in context and did not actually use it as a slur. Secondly, it appears as if he was responding to a question.

In case I am ever questioned about anything I would like GLAAD, PETA, the ACLU, and other similar organizations to please post a list of words that I should not use; even when answering specific questions or within the context of defending myself against accusations. I assume "faggot" should be the "fag-word" since "f-word" is spoken for. Perhaps it should be the "gay f-word", or can we not use gay?

TR Knight had this to say on, shocker, the Ellen DeGenerate show:

Knight, who said soon after the October fracas that he is gay, appeared in Tuesday's taping of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" to discuss the original incident and Washington's recent comments.

"He referred to me as a faggot," Knight said of the October incident. "Everyone heard it."

I would also like announce that if I am ever in the spotlight and it starts to fade I will immediately announce that I am gay. Simultaneously I will then ask people to act like I never said that since I am supposed to be no different than anyone else. If that doesn't work I will wait three months and announce that I am not gay just to start conversation about myself.

Also, Robert Redford thinks the Bush administration owes us an apology.

Why I watch...

I watch the first three weeks of the show because it makes me feel better about myself. When I see these talentless delusional morons jack their jaws about how great they are and then they sound like a bag of cats I feel like a freakin' genius. For sure I am not a genius but compared to these yo-yos I should run the country. It's truly funny to watch people who are tone deaf and have NEVER sung before in front of anyone think they are good only to get beaten into reality by their own failure.
I won't be watching the show after the hysterics are over since they always seem to run off anyone with musical ability at the end. I will say the exception to that is the season one winner who has actually done well so far, and perhaps the season four winner will also continue to be successful.

H.I.N. pt8

Monday Presto cleaners spent 5 hours , they were quoted 2 by Generic home improvement center, cleaning the downstairs of my house. At the same time a different company came in and vacuumed the duct work. The company that vacuumed the ducts also lays tile flooring and said mine looked like crap. Thanks!